wasn’t the last time you lost a home game in October 2010? sloppy. sloppy.
Last one for a bit (Taken with instagram)
Mother of Mercy’s last-ish show. Welp, there goes another band I dig (secret fan). Thanks for the tunes pals.
one with the poncho: cat interruption
is it strange that now, even with my big bed, i STILL have a side of the bed i sleep on? i have tried to sleep in the middle and it feels weird. i, also, have a great deal of trouble sleeping— i think it’s because of my accidental day naps, vicious cycle— but i don’t want to make it worse by trying to force myself off my side.
for all the horrible things in the world, and the smaller less horrible but still painful things i have to deal with, this isn’t important at all, but man, isn’t this what life is about? sleeping alone, hearing gay dudes coming home from after hours gay clubs outside my window while wearing a pro-gay marriage shirt, hearing my cat snore, and TALKING ABOUT thinking about sleeping (meta)? but this is what i care about most, simple things. breakfast tomorrow morning. trying to get my ass to the planeterium soon. mummies in west philly by work. what cans of soup i’ll store in my office in my desk.
now if i can just get the window shut/ open ration just perfect so it can be chilly while i sleep. science, trial and error, man.
Picture (taken by Rashi): Friday, post-Cantina Vegan Chorizo with Butternut Squash Tacos and a (maybe) strong drink.
I had a rough week: no longer having someone who had become a somewhat of a constant in my life— who may have been my valentine, this weird cryptic message I can’t explain here, and my cat facing death. I ended up getting a lot of housekeeping things done, going to the gym on Sunday, and writing the draft of a paper. I made rice and beans for lunch the following day and packed it up. Thank heavens I laid my clothes out because I woke up 30 minutes before class (woops). Got there 5 minutes late (I am miraculous) but with no makeup because I left it in Rashi’s car (woops). But the weather was so beautiful, and people seemed so happy and filled with love, that I didn’t care! I was so happy my cat was doing well, that the sun was shining, and that I could feel good about my primary valentine— myself (nothing really new there but you know). Went to the lab, went to dinner with my roomie, gave out valentines, baked chocolate cake, and watched RAW while drinking tea. Solid night.
I miss my mother. I miss a lot of my friends who aren’t around, but I can love these people wherever they are, and I guess that’s why I am okay with this holiday. You can’t do anything from everywhere, but you can love, even if that needs to extend beyond this life. Eventually, all love seems to resemble each other, beyond the kinds we boil it down to. The people who are a part of us, are a part of us. Life can be horrible, cruel, severely isolating and lonely. We need to feel that side and I have unfortunately been dealt those hands more times than not. But every time I fold, I find that I appreciate the simple things of love and caring more. And it is okay. Eventually you smile at someone and it makes sense, whatever kind of love it is. Someone loves you. Others will love you. And when I struggle with a sense of hopelessness in facing my future, my solitude, I just slow down, vent, and re-remember that it will be okay. It won’t always be like this. Anything and everything can and will change. The future has an infinite amount of possibility and the unknown is not frightening. But once you face it, it no longer is (Antoine de Saint-Exupery focuses on this a good deal). And life will get harder and will always have challenges, but if you have love, you have very little to worry about. It goes a long way.
1 year ago - 
8
8okay, what the FUCK is going on here. NO REALLY. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE. KESHA IS SMOKING CRACK WITH JESUS? and who the fucking told this girl it was a good idea to try and dance.
